“HOW WELL CAN YOU…?”

1. COOK: I can put together a decent meal.

2. SEW: Depends on what I’m sewing. When it comes to most things, sub-par.

3. CLEAN: I’m the best that I know.

4. SING: I can carry a tune, and my tone isn’t unpleasant, so I’d say fairly well.

5. PLAY AN INSTRUMENT: I play the violin well, but I’m not amazing.

6. WRITE: I’m a pretty good writer, but quite rusty at it.

7. READ: Very unfaithful, but good when I’ve found something that captures my interest.

8. PAINT/DRAW: Oh my goodness. I have absolutely no talent in this area whatsoever. Kyrie will be surpassing my skill level soon.

9. TELL STORIES: I’m pretty good at it — don’t do it often, though.

10. PERSUADE: That all depends on who I’m trying to persuade.

11. RESIST THOSE WHO WOULD PERSUADE YOU: It’s my speciality.

12. FLIRT: I used to be pretty good. I’m horrible at it now. I don’t flirt with anyone besides my husband, but when I try to flirt with him, I just come off as retarded.

13. SEDUCE: Haha. That’s easy (again, just talking about my husband). And might I add that this is a really inappropriate question.

14. DRESS: I think I can put a nice outfit together.

15. DECORATE A ROOM: Oh, I’m good.

16. DECORATE A CAKE: Average. My skills have impressed some.

17. PARALLEL PARK: I haven’t done that since driver’s ed.

18. REGULAR PARK: Pretty good, but I look for the spaces with lots of room on both sides.

19. CONTROL YOURSELF AROUND FOOD: I’ve never thought about controlling myself around food….?

20. CONTROL YOUR STRONGEST EMOTIONS: It’s a work in progress.

21. TAKE CARE OF CHILDREN: I do a good job, most of the time.

22. MAKE A CUP OF COFFEE: Don’t make it. I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t do a good job.

23. MOTIVATE YOURSELF: I’m pretty good at this unless I’m terribly depressed.

24. ORGANIZE: I hate organizing. I try to just make sure things don’t get disorganized in the first place. But of course that’s unrealistic, and I do a decent job when the job needs to be done.

25. MAKE A DEADLINE: I don’t really do deadlines.

26. MAKE OTHERS FEEL COMFORTABLE: Hopefully I’m good at this. I know a bunch of people who are way worse, so of course that makes me feel better.

27. WRAP A GIFT: Eh, I’m okay.

28. DANCE: The Rachel Dance became famous for a reason. So, yeah, to answer the question…not great.

29. SWIM: I can swim competently for short distances.

30. DEBATE: I’m a very good debater. But I hate that other people are sensitive, so I don’t debate often.

31. DEFEND YOURSELF PHYSICALLY: I dunno, I’ve never had to. I have a feeling I would fail.

Check out the Democrat opponent of McCain’s buddy Lindsey. Bob Conley is said to have more in common with Ron Paul than with his own party. Kind of makes you want to go Democrat, right? RIGHT?

An interesting scientific study on out of body experiences after death

The other night, Kyrie was very cranky and crying during Compline, and towards the middle of Compline, she fell asleep. Then, I said this prayer:

“Keep watch, dear Lord, with those who work, or watch, or weep this night, and give your angels charge over those who
sleep. Tend the sick, Lord Christ; give rest to the weary, bless the dying, soothe the suffering, pity the afflicted, shield the joyous; and all for your love’s sake. Amen.”

My sleeping daughter let out a laugh when I said, “weep this night.”

DOUGLAS — A celebration of life for James William “Jim” Adams, 53, will be held at a later date…Jim, who had tired of reading obituaries noting other’s courageous battles with this or that disease, wanted it known that he lost his battle. It was primarily as a result of being stubborn and not following doctor’s orders or maybe for just living life a little too hard for better than five decades….He was sadly deprived of his final wish, which was to be run over by a beer truck on the way to the liquor store to buy booze for a date. True to his personal style, he spent his final hours joking with medical personnel, cussing and begging for narcotics and bargaining with God to look over his loving dog, Biscuit, and his family…He would like to thank all “his ladies” for putting up with him the last 30 years…During his life, he excelled at anything he put his mind to. He loved to hear and tell jokes and spin tales of grand adventures he may or may not have had…In lieu of flowers, he asks that you make a sizeable purchase at your favorite watering hole, get rip roaring drunk and tell the stories he no longer can.

We all got our hair colored (temporary stuff) and went to the fair on Friday. It was tons of fun. I ate lots of junk food.

K: “Are you putting chocolate syrup on your ice cream?”
Me: “Yes.”
K: “That’s silly.”

Overheard: “Jesus died on the cross, and his mommy was sad.”

K: “I’m painting a triangle.”
Me: “That’s a very good triangle.”
K: “I’m making eyes for my triangle.”
Me: “Oh, your triangle has eyes?”
K: “Someday, a triangle is going to talk.”

One thing I’ve really enjoyed since Kyrie was born is putting her to sleep. I’ve probably done this more than any other child responsibility. Something about papa and just wanting to go to sleep. Since Kyrie’s birth, I’ve used two main lullabies to get her to sleep. The one I use most often is “Eat this Bread” (followed by “American Pie,” which is what I use when she’s not very tired).

Anyway, after compline tonight, both Rachel and I were singing her to sleep. It doesn’t happen very often that we both sing her to sleep together, but Kyrie stopped us in the middle of our singing to say this:

Kyrie (tapping her doll’s head): I put water on her head.
Rick: To baptize her, so she can be in Jesus?
Kyrie: Yes.
Rachel: Do you know anything about this?
Rick: Noooo.