In John D. Caputo’s What Would Jesus Deconstruct?, Caputo relates Jacques Derrida’s concept of gift to the New Testament concept of forgiveness. He notes that, in the New Testament, forgiveness is uneconomic and mad–that is to say, it is not an exchange of debts and credits.

Caputo rightly expresses that the Christian Right (as well as Jews) has typically put conditions on forgiveness. In this economic view of forgiveness, forgiveness has four steps:

Forgiveness requires an expression of sorrow, the intention to make amends, a promise not to repeat the offense, and a willingness to do penance. If someone meets all four conditions then they have earned forgiveness. We owe it to them the way the bank owes us the deed once the mortgage is paid off. A deal is a deal.”*

But Jesus turns this concept of forgiveness on its head in Matthew 5:

“You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I tell you: Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be sons of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous. If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that? And if you greet only your brothers, what are you doing more than others? Do not even pagans do that? Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect.”

Or as Caputo puts it,

“If you love those who love you, what good is that? It makes perfect sense. Even the mafia does that. The unaccountable excess of love is felt when you love your enemies, when you love the unlovable–those whom it is unreasonable to love–which is the madness of the kingdom, which follows the nonprincipal of nonsufficient reason! Just so, the unaccountable excess of forgiveness is felt when we forgive precisely those who do not meet some or all of the four conditions, who are not sorry, do not repent, and do not intend to mend their ways. That is, genuine forgiveness is offered unconditionally, not the subject to meeting any or all of these four conditions, exactly the way Jesus prayed for the forgiveness of the Roman soldiers. Just so, we often speak of things that are unforgivable–the Holocaust, say, or the atrocities of American slavery or apartheid, or the several attempts at genocide we have witnessed in the past century. But would not such unforgivable things be the very subject matter of genuine forgiveness?”**

Can you imagine a world where we actually followed Jesus’s teaching on forgiveness instead of our hearts?

* 73-74
** 74

I was just listening to Rebecca St. James and Todd Agnew sing “Our Great God,” and it just reminded me how thankful I feel right now.

We’ve had a ton of bills lately with the new table (we outgrew the old one), computer (it died), washer and dryer (they were dying together), computer, midwife, doula, tuition, and visits from family. God has provided a lot of money to meet those bills. I mean a lot. Close to $10,000 in the last three weeks. (I broke a Black Friday sales record and received my overload pay from teaching all in the last three weeks.) That almost covers everything (yeah, they add up). What would normally have been a stressful time has not been that bad.

I have a beautiful new son. The birth was incredible. It couldn’t have gone any more perfectly. The doula was incredible when it came to supporting Rachel. The whole time Rachel was in labor, I kept thanking God for her. The midwife was great too, but let the doula pretty much handle things.

My daughter continues to grow in her relationship to Christ. She amazes me sometimes.

I’m glad to be in a church where we can chant, receive communion every week, feel loved, and our children can commune. We’ve actually been able to develop a relationship with a fellow congregation member (though in its early stages, it’s nice to be able to connect to someone other than the pastor and his family). The lady is a bit older than us, but her youngest son is close to Kyrie’s age.

My class this semester will be taught by Reggie Kidd, and it’s on my favorite subject. How great is that? I’ve been able to finish most of the books (I saved the best ones for last, so woohoo).

I’ve had off of work for three straight days. I don’t think I’ve had more than one day in a row off since August (and even then I was usually working on my day off). It’s been a time of healing and rest (though I must say I am wiped out from all the work I am doing–but it’s different work, so in a big way, it’s restful).

We have family coming to visit. Forrest and Rebekah will be here in less than two weeks. The Enloe family also plans to come by. Mommy and daddy plan on coming in February. It will be so nice to have company again, and it’s nice to have a table that will fit everyone (tightly though!).

I love how all of our close friends’ families are growing. Exponential growth is nice when it involves friends.

We are planning to stay our entire summer in Spokane, if possible. Actually, it would be nice to just move up there, so maybe a job can fall in our laps (pretty please!).

It’s Advent. The long green season is fully over.

Oh, Lord remind us once again of your wonderful works. Hallelujah! Glory be to our great God.

Dear prayer partners, [that seems to include everyone, family, friends and colleagues!]

This is Joanne and this is really just a quick update as several people have asked about us. We’ve waited quite a while to update this time because for two to three weeks things have been up and down a great deal.

On Sat. for instance, Bob had a very good day and was able to write. However, yesterday was very difficult but with some help from Hospice and your prayers, as well as those of close friends who came over after church to pray with us, we weathered that crisis.

Each day is different. Bob is in decline and we know where this will probably end up but we still take each day at a time and thank God for his blessings and all the time we’ve been given. Bob has outlived the most optimistic prognosis by four months and every day of that time has been a gift even though it’s often been hard.

I know that Bob is suffering more than he lets on so I ask for specific prayers that he won’t continue to suffer physically but will be aware and alert to the end. We still ask for a miracle healing because we believe and trust that God can do that and we honor that belief. But, we also ask for grace and peace these days and I ask for your prayers for continued physical strength and health for myself so that I can serve Bob during these hard days.

There have been many, many times when we almost couldn’t pray but knew that many of you and the Holy Spirit were praying with and for us. We could feel it in our hearts and we could see the benefits so know that your many prayers have mattered.

Last night we watched Ben-Hur, which we do every Easter season. It’s my favorite movie and we always marvel at the clear Christian message it presents [from Hollywood in 1959 no less!] and it buoys our spirits during this Lenten season. If you’ve never seen it or don’t remember it, watch it. It will warm your heart and the actors actually “act” in it!

Love to you all,

Bob and Joanne

Here’s the latest email from our dear friend, Bob, Please continue to pray for his healing and renewed strength:

Living Between two Realities

Once again, Joanne and I want to say a heartfelt thanks to all of you who have so faithfully and earnestly prayed for us. Thanks for the numerous emails and cards! We’ve been totally overwhelmed.

I’m now more than six weeks out from the day I was sent home from the hospital with my oncologist’s words echoing in my mind, “You have two to four weeks left to live.”

Since my last email I have been steadily improving, so much so that Joanne says, “The old Bob is back.” We have been asking ourselves, “how and what do you pray for” when you live in-between your doctor’s realism, “I’ve never had a pancreatic patient survive” and the experience of feeling that “God is healing me.”

So, how do you pray? I want to ask God to heal me but what if he already has. But, I’m also reluctant to be presumptuous and tell everyone I’ve been healed given the statistical downside of pancreatic cancer and the fact that we are foregoing any definite tests for now, like a MRI, CT scan or PET scan.

So, here is how we solved our dilemma. We live and pray one day at a time. We pray each day and say, “Thank you God for the healing you gave me today. Please heal me tomorrow.” It has occurred to both of us that if we were truly spiritually sensitive, we would have prayed that way all of our lives but it took the threat of imminent death to bring us to this point.

We cannot begin to tell all of you how we have benefited from your consistent prayers. We’re convinced that God is answering those prayers and that all the improvement thus far has come from God’s healing powers and that He is the source of all grace. I am confident that God sustained me today but I’m also painfully aware that I am “terminal,” at some point, in the larger sense of the word, as we all are. Thanks be to God that Jesus Christ has conquered sin and death and we all face a great future.

Please continue your prayers for both of us. Joanne will see her doctor and have some tests done as her stomach tension and discomfort continues. We think it’s “caregiver” stress but want to be sure. Also, although I’m better, my strength is fragile and I fatigue easily. Some days are better than others. We appreciate the way everyone has maintained our privacy and ask that you continue to do so.

I hope that you all know that the love and prayers you have “sent” our way are being returned to you from us. We are so deeply moved by them on our behalf.

The following is a quote I came across that seems to define our dual life as Christians and the “between two realities” phrase above:

“Our favorite distinction between the spiritual life and the practical life is false. We cannot divide them. One affects the other all the time; for we are creatures of sense and of spirit, and must live an amphibious life.”

Love,

Bob and Joanne

Dear friends,

Four weeks ago this past Saturday my oncologist sent me home from the hospital with the news that I had 2-4 weeks to live. However, once off all the heavy medications, I began to feel better–not well enough by any stretch to return to a normal life but better than I felt in the hospital.

I seem to be holding my own at this point after continuing to improve steadily those first two weeks. Now I seem to be holding my own, neither worse nor better from day-to-day.

The cancer, which has remained inoperable, is either, 1) being destroyed and I am healed [which we pray and hope is the case] or, 2) is temporarily in some kind of holding pattern and may stay that way for a while or take a quick downturn at any time.

Please continue to pray for both Joanne and myself. We are both a little depressed, yet continuing to trust in the power of God to heal me. Thanks so much to all of you for your many, many continuous prayers, for your love and for all the cards, emails, etc. We literally feel upheld by your faithfulness and intercession on our behalf.

Love,
Bob